Underdark Rising

CASE 11: The Jerkin Tightens
  • Umberhulk restrained—briefly—on suspicion of murder and/or public consumption of the dead.
  • Investigated a cry for help originating from a nearby alternate dimension.
  • Charged a Painted Guardian with obstruction of justice; sentencing later reduced to indefinite slavery.
  • Mirror-man wanted for impersonating an officer.
  • Interviewed Aquila, a flighty bird woman with red feathered wings serving as a messenger from the Capitol. She has been unable to return home since the closing of the Ascending Gate. She wears an porcelain mask that she refuses to remove, which she claims was gifted to her by a King. Her name is likely a derivative of the underlatin word for ‘eagle’.
  • Interviewed Philip T. Hennessy, a middle-aged dwarven male and self-proclaimed member of the Brewer Rebellion. Philip described himself as the tactical mind behind their organization, which has been implicated in numerous acts of smuggling, kidnapping, murder, and Capitol Treason. May want to bring in for further questioning.
  • Identified Harold Tallsinger as an important member of the Brewer hierarchy. Human male in his late 40’s, previously the general manager of the Puckered Goose. Whereabouts unknown.
  • Identified Jenna Krisborne as one of the three leaders of the Brewers. Female gnome in her early 30’s ( HRE). Is considered armed with two short swords and also dangerous.
  • Acquired research material on Cryptography, L-men, and the King’s Sword.
  • Thoroughly inspected Kassandra Eris-Aleta Estanfor. Human female with elven ancestry in her late 20’s/early 30’s (HRE). Suspected of being a princess. Is protected by a golden serpent companion she refers to as ‘Cuddles’
  • Met a monk in black robes who implied he had worked as a Watcher at some point.
  • Extracted Watcher Manin White from the depths beneath Certis Station using a river that was more metaphorical than anyone’s really comfortable thinking about.
CASE 09: Prison Hooch

“Hey canibros, main man Billy Freskin here once a fuckin ‘gain. I gotta tell yeah, it’s been real out there. Like real real. Inside prices hitting that roof, but you know outside’s just givin it away for free. Like we be in some kinda tipsy turvey Underton. Sheit.

But yeah yeah, that’d be a fast way to catch somethin, somethin unnatural if you ain careful. You gotta be safe out there man, especially now that law and order be fallin apart. Tsh, Ol’ Billy got a keen ear for opportunity tho. Hooked up wit this black chick, you know, professionally speakin. She too hard a motherfucker for Billy, talkin dark arts and shit, but she runnin some angles, and her maid’s a sweetheart, y’know, for a ghost. An Billy don’t judge people on that kinda shit.

Yeah so anyways them Brewers got a lil’ surprise today with they scones, allegedly. Bunch of them Watchmen guys busted outta prison, and boy they was piiiissed. But damn man, you shoulda seen this Doregal dude. Coulda fed a family of four all month long. Real fuckin shame we had to leave him behind like that…"

CASE 08: Brewing Insurgency

“A call to arms, brought by Pendak Wavelight,
He ventures onward, seeking a phantom of golden might,
While upward his companions return once more,
To face the rot eating at Underton’s core.

The playful in purple at the threshold insists,
On a fear of blue fire that nothing can resist,
No part will she have in the deadly insurrection,
For only death awaits a gathering of the spectrum.

Yet even a broken watch can be right twice a day,
And a beer is too, or so the studies say,
But when Brewers go bad and their taste runs flat,
Only the Watch can institute prohibition: coup d’etat."

Shudder Before the Beautiful

“Imagination and evolution start,
A new species from a vial,
Poured into the deep silences,
Between beats of the heart.

The final choir begins to sing.
Their stone voices lifting a seal,
From an ancient chest filled with stars;
A gift for the world’s new King.

Incomplete and unworthy are aligned,
Into a greater new design.
Shudder now before the beautiful
Fate awaiting all mankind."

CASE 07: Brain Drain

The temporary subjugation force was gone. Again. He was alone once more. He blinked slowly as he considered this, but there was nothing to be done for it. Rolling back his shoulders, he launched himself deeper into the heart of subterranean installation. . .

. . . spattered against the pages of the journal from a racking cough that struck his gaunt scaled form as he blearily regarded the Singer, her voice full of promise, full of endings, full of death—now he cracked a painful and cruel grin—that was better than slowly wasting away, livestock bereft even of the most basic purpose: to feed their superiors; no, he would spare them that and someday, somewhere, someone else would surely find a way to begin the Great Work anew. . .

. . . Old chains rattled and tugged insistently, reaching for a servant ready made to feed its master’s ancient hunger. But that which has shattered can never be truly remade as it was before. Now she was beyond those writhing bindings; they belonged to another life, to a different mask. . .

. . . The leaves of metal embraced and the world was finally silent once more. But the dreams continued on, like the bright cavern without end, rich and alien and without purpose, other than it simply just was.

CASE 06: Dark Rising

A town in desperate need of heroes… that don’t turn into monsters.
A conspiracy that will go to any length to stay buried and forgotten.
A Man In White haunted by the phantoms of his past.
And an obsidian vial that shatters all restraint,
On the crawling darkness within men’s hearts.

CASE 05: Biting the Bulette

“They’ve even turned Fireforge’s boy, the faerie one.” His faced scrunched sourly as he flapped his fingers like tiny wings. “Saw him arrive at the station, I did. Real blood proves true, it does.”

“You spendin’ lot of time at the watch eh, Sedirek?” A loud clatter as the speaker hoisted his new wooden prosthetic onto the poorly balanced table.

“The fuck’s that supposed to mean? Someone’s gotta keep an eye on that nest of snakes. How else you gonna spot traitors? Death to all traitors, I say.”

“Someone certainly tipped ’em off about the Lackerton mine.” Another dwarf rumbled into his tankard, glancing sidelong at the wooden stump before quickly looking away.

“Fucking snitches, selling out their brothers. I say death to all traitors, watchmen and elves. Nothing but cowards the lot. They’re no match for us in a real fight.”

The table wobbled precariously as the wooden leg grated across it. “Yeah? Know a lot about fighting do you Sedirek? More than a cavern-finder? How many Bulettes you faced that couldn’t be defeated by turning the page? Oscar didn’t raise no coward, elf or otherwise.”

The dwarf seated between shifted uncomfortably. “Brother Steelback, what are you—”

“I’m saying the enemy ain’t the stupid bastards down here in the shit with us. Those elite motherfuckers in the Capitol, high up in their goddamn Tower, that’s who’s starving us and our families.”

“You going soft on us, Steel? The watch do you a favor so now you’re all sweet on them?”

“Yeah, some cowardly watchmen saved the lives of me and mine. Whereas you’re just a sleazy piece of shit that I’d sleep easier if we chucked down an open mine shaft.”

“Brothers! Peace!”

“Peace? Came to the wrong place for that. Only hard fightin’ ahead of us here, even if the Brewers hold their end of it, so spare me the idealistic bullshit. Because there’s gonna be a lot of us growing new wooden limbs before it’s all said and done.”


  • Inspector Kuggs – Lead on Red Phantom Task Force at Underton Station. Dispatched officers to Certis for their safety and promoted them to Acting Constables.
  • Ulara – Thief who cracked the safe at the Puckered Goose. Kuggs has placed her in witness protection.
  • Constable Faeland – Kuggs has been alerted this officer may be a co-conspirator of the Red Phantom.
  • Shank the Sharkman – Gang leader terrorizing the cavernlands between Reaches. Involved in the trade of restricted weapons-grade shrooms with the Brewers.
  • Sargent Barnabi – In charge of Certis Station in the Lower Reaches.
  • Oscar Fireforge – Respected foreman and political figure of the Lower Reaches mining community.
  • Terrance the Magi – Resident magician for a three-man consulting agency.
  • Howard the Plentiful – Large priest who weighs in on the divine.
  • Rijndael the C̥̟̭̕r҉̪̰͉̫y̵͎͚͍p̯̀ṱ̴͚͓͎o̭m̝̘̞̜̰͠a̙͓̱͈͚n͍͍̦͇c̖͓̭̳̭̳ḛ̸̞̺̻̫͓r – Probably some kind of pervert.


  • Officers temporarily dispatched to Certis Station in the Lower Reaches until the Red Phantom incident is contained.
  • Traveled to Lower Reaches by Geary’s Gate using a little known tunnel system. Met a retired Snerf Watchman who warned about Shank, a ruffian who had staked out turf in the cavernlands.
  • Met a peculiar woman in purple garments being chased down by Shank’s bullywugs. In the ensuing melee, she very nearly twisted an ankle.
  • Acquired a Sack Of Bats, a Ring of Self-Invisibility, and a strange ivory mask of divine origin.
  • Officers dispatched to investigate rumors of illegal mineral extraction deep in the Lackerton Mine. The mounting tensions between the miners and constables appeared to be at a breaking point, until an enraged Bulette reminded them of what they shared in common: not wanting to be killed by Bulettes.
  • The Bulette’s physical appearance was deemed atypical due to missing segments of armor and a proliferation of strange tubes emerging from its flesh.
  • Upon investigating the tunnel the Bulette had emerged from, the officers found themselves in a strange hidden laboratory. Unfortunately, without their dour canary the watchmen nearly succumbed to toxic fumes. Through a herculean effort, Constable Rockbreaker managed to haul his squadmates to safety while under fire from scaled men in white coats wielding tasing wands.
  • Not much is known about the facility, other than the repeated printing of “S10-4” along the walls.
Interim: Words for the Unwary

“Just so we’re all clear,” the dark-skinned man warned as he accepted the bowl, “it’s not like I need food or water to survive down here.”

“You seem to be eating it all the same.”

“Umh? That’s because it’s delicious.” Noticing her frown for the first time, he spins the chopsticks around and jabs the air pointedly. “You don’t know much about being a witch do you?”

Varla felt the heat in her face, but to her own surprise she snapped back instead of recoiling from the accusation. “I knew enough to capture you.”

Joseph waved the objection away while raising the bowl to eye level with his other hand. “Clarity of terms is essential.” He slowly turned the bowl as he examined it. “This food is appreciated, but it is not required. Were an Obligation to take hold, I would repay it with soup and not with my life.”

The young witch paused in thought as the strange man resumed eating once more.

“I’ve never been able to snare a person before. Until now it’s only worked on things, like toys or clothing.”

“Mmh. Well, that’s the key insight there. A witch must think of people as things in order to control them. My race, skin color, dialect, all these help you ignore our shared humanity. Don’t worry, it’ll become easier as you get older.”

“I don’t know if I want to… to think of people like that.”

“It’s just a part of growing up as a witch. You need to start practicing your narcissism now, not just your magic, if you want to grasp true strength. Would you like some advice?”

She nods haltingly, her expression troubled.

“First, the tall orphan. Kedrick. He’s going to be a liability. A natural leader, and far too principled; you’ll need to get rid of him to control the rest. But you must do it carefully otherwise you’ll lose Clara, and a healer is a powerful asset. She is a follower at heart, so work to make her yours.” Joseph pauses briefly, his eyes thoughtful. “Now, the pebble slinger, Whistler, has some rough potential. Not terribly bright, morally flexible, fiercely loyal. In skilled hands he’d make an excellent henchman, until you can replace him with a sharper weapon of course. Remember that: they’re always replaceable.”

The skirt twisted in her clenched fist, the hem writhing against the stone floor and leaving claw-like patterns in the thin dust of the underground cavern. Brusquely she shoved away floating strands of hair to glare openly at the man, who resumed noisily eating noodles without noticing her gaze.

After a long moment she turned away and began ascending the stairs. Once she reached the top, she spoke softly over her shoulder, “You can keep your counsel. I pity the heart that could speak it.”

When the young witch was out of sight, Joseph slowly lowered the bowl, only a slight tremor in his hand as he wiped the sweat from his brow. Perhaps the warning would help in the years to come. At least now she knew the risks of what she could become.

CASE 04: The Orphan and the Monk

“Excuse me officer!”

“…What are you doing back here?”

“I came to report a crime! As a typical helpless civilian, I am unfamiliar with protocol and easily driven to emotional hysterics when confronted with the specter of my own mortality! I need a powerful and stoic authority figure to take matters firmly in hand, so that I may continue sleepwalking through life wrapped in the warm blanket of security they provide to irrational—yet beautiful—women like myself.”

“Hmh. Fair enough. What seems to be the trouble?”

“Oh, it’s just terrible, Mr…?”

“Inspector.” A slightly frigid pause, and then he softens. “Inspector Kuggs, ma’am.”

“Oh, Mr. Inspector Kuggs, you would not believe it—except you will. There’s a dead man on Caelog’s Street, only dead isn’t quite the word for it. The poor soul has been turned completely to ash! I fear for the children of our great nation… what if this becomes a new fad like those stupid golden scarves?”

“I… see. That would be unfortunate. I’ll send some of my officers to take a look.”

“What a dear! If it’s not too much trouble, could you send the one with the lovely eyes? I think they should have an especially close look.”

The Inspector frowns in slight confusion. “Hmh. Sorry, what was your name again?”

“My name? It matters not to a man as strong and handsome as yourself.”

“Nevermind, it doesn’t matter. Anyways, if you’ll excuse me, I have a briefing I need to attend.”

The man dressed in garish purple robes grins and then madly dashes towards the front door. He’s barely through it before he collapses on the stairs, helplessly rolling about in a fit of contagious giggling laughter.


  • Sargent Pilcher – Temporarily reassigned to Dano’s spot watching the empty cells.
  • Inspector Kuggs – Leading the Red Phantom Task Force, seeks to close the case before the Annual Review.
  • Constable Faeland & Birchmire – Assigned to investigate Philips Underale merger.
  • Constable Jenkins & Taskett – Assigned to go undercover to find leads on the Red Phantom.
  • Constable Wilkens & Sens – Assigned to look into Drake Hardcastle and the Puckered Goose.
  • Ash guy – Man completely turned into ash. After disturbing the remains, Officer Moab uncovered a strange black liquid which forced him to ingest itself. Things got weird after that.
  • Joseph Stonekicker – The unwilling Guardian of the Stairs at the Destiny Falls Orphanage. Wanted for damaging Watch property.
  • The Tiny Witch – Presumably the orphan who bound Joseph to his current job.
  • Red Phantom – Confronted officers at the Orphanage and attempted to murder Ulara (alias Mula the Rat Queen)
  • Ulara – Thief who cracked the safe at the Puckered Goose. Witnessed the Red Phantom slaying the other jail inmates with the assistance of a Watchman, escaped, and was almost hunted down at the Orphanage until a daring rescue by the Watch.


  • Prior to the incident with the Red Phantom, Constable Pendak acquired testimony from Tucker implicating Stanley Jameson in the murder of Carl Frost. It is now believed Pendak’s partners were unintentional victims of Stanley’s death dog coverup.
  • The Cavern Map and Deciphering Legend have been given to Inspector Kuggs and he has been made aware of a possible mole within the force.
  • The Red Phantom is reported to have a magical dispenser that produces weapons with his logo, which he then catapults into his victims.
  • The Watch is putting a temporary moratorium on the LC-400 series contract due to concerns regarding mounting maintenance costs and rumors of excessive police brutality.

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